These are letters typical of the ones I have received from both junior high and high school students over the last fourteen years. They have been unedited for spelling, grammar or content. I have received over 40,000 such letters, many of them heart-breaking, insightful, and some very funny. Names have been eliminated to protect the kids.

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"The Girl With the STD"

Yes, that’s me, the girl with the STD. I may be the girl sitting in front of you, or behind you. Or, I may even be at your side. I may be the best friend that never told you because I was afraid that you might think of me as a slut. I come from a really small town where everyone knows everything, but no one knows that I have a disease. I am only 17 years old and have slept with three different guys in just two years. I started having sex when I was only 15. Now I have an STD that will never go away. It’s called Genital Warts. I got it from my last boyfriend. We are both having to learn how to deal with it. At least he’s still with me. It has not been easy. I found out I also have cervical cancer and, according to the doctors, that makes my chances of having a child more difficult. But what’s actually the hardest for me to deal with are all the questions in my mind. Questions like, “Why did this have to happen to me?” It’s questions that I can’t find answers for and probably never will.

The reason I’m telling you all this is because I hope you will never have to experience the pain that I have. Believe me, you don’t ever want to know what it’s like to be up nights crying like I do, or being scared to death to go to the doctor again so he can tell you what else is wrong with your body, all because of a few nights with that “special person!”

PLEASE THINK ABOUT THIS! IF YOU DON’T, IT MAY NOT BE JUST MY BOYFRIEND AND I GOING THROUGH THIS…IT WILL BE YOU! GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR LIFE. MAY IT TURN OUT THE VERY BEST FOR YOU AND THE ONES YOU CARE ABOUT MOST.

THE GIRL JUST LIKE YOU

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Brad,

I tried to do what you said and not ever repeat the way I used to act. I am sad to say that I have failed. Relationships scare me, sex doesn’t. I know that really sounds weird…but see if all it is is sex then if they turn around and run then they are running away from the sex and I just tell myself well all it was was sex. But if there is more than just sex and they run away they must be running away from me. I mean, I enjoy sex too but I could walk away form it…it’s not everything. I used to plan on waiting. It’s just I have begun to use it as my wall to hide behind, to shield me from rejection. That way only my body is rejected not my soul, my inner personality. See I made that mistake with the first guy I was ever with. I let him in heart and soul and body...and he rejected me. I will never recover from that. A part of me still loves him…like six months later. I won’t make that mistake again and that is why I hide behind the mask of sex. That way I still get the attention and ‘nurturing’ I crave and I don’t have to worry about “me” getting rejected. I go in expecting nothing so when I get nothing it’s no surprise. I am truly lost.

Brad,

Ok, first of all you were wrong about some of the things and me any girlfriend are perfectly fine and we were gonna have sex for the first time this weekend and after your speech, she doesn’t want to anymore and that’s all because of you!!!!!! Yeah, me and her both got checked for STD’s and we both are clean. Why the f_ _ k did you have to brainwash my girlfriend and all of the girls at our school? DUDE, sex is cool at a young age. It feels different but you would not know that cuz u were against sex before marriage. WRITE BACK and tell me why the f_ _k you had to f_ _k that up for me.

Signed,

Now I’m a senior. I’ve been dealing with the whole losing my virginity thing since freshmen year. Every time I saw your speech I was with a different guy.

I constantly think about it. You think guys do more, but I doubt that. But I’m different. I think more about how I regret it. How I regret losing the most pure thing about life in the back of my boyfriend’s pickup parked at a construction sight when I was only 14yrs old. How I regret staying with him for so long because I couldn’t tell him no. How I regret going to the Gorge for a concert and sleeping with someone after an hour of knowing him, later to find out he was six years older (and) engaged to be married. How I regret dating a virgin and sleeping with him, taking his purity away later to find out he didn’t love me, never did, and won’t. How I regret letting him control me, letting him get me drunk when he knew I was pregnant, killing the baby, and blaming me in the end. How I regret sleeping with two more guys after that, including my current boyfriend.

But I have to say, most of all, I have to say I regret not listening to you. You knew. You’re letters said so. You said so. Choosing the highest good for the other person. Damn it, not a day goes by that I don’t regret every time I had sex. And do you want to know the worst part? I can’t remember, and don’t have a clue how many times I have had it. Well over 600-700 times, though.

I am scarred. So scarred I can barely write this. My hands are shaking and I’m on the verge of tears. I’m curled up on my comfy chair, waiting for my boyfriend to come pick me up. There’s no one home. I’m about to tell him I don’t want to have sex anymore. He’ll probably think I’m joking. He’ll probably throw stuff, get angry and yell. Then he’ll dump me. I’ve never been dumped before. I always dumped them ‘cause they scarred me.

Brad, I’m so scared. He’s going to come over soon, expecting sex. You’re so right. It’s all he’ll think about. It’s all he does think about. What am I going to do? You’d think after I’ve been used so much before I’d learn. You’d think after hearing your speech four times I’d learn. But no, I’m stubborn.

It didn’t hurt before. I had that “I’m so invincible to everything and everyone” attitude. But now it hurts. It hurts so bad. I don’t want a boyfriend anymore until I recover at least a little bit. Unfortunately I know I can’t recover fully.

I guess I know now. A little late, I suppose. I ruined my 50 years (of married life) by having sex with five guys in high school. But I don’t hate my boyfriend. I love him, but not by the definition you gave. I want the highest good for him, but I haven’t been giving it to him in the past. I wish him the best. I wish you the best. Keep speaking Brad. Keep telling people they need to listen to you. I know I wish I did. But now my boyfriend’s here. And my life is down hill. The tears are too heavy to handle. Write me.

High School Girl

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Brad,

I got to be very honest with you, but you really scared the poo-poo out of me. You made me really think about everything. I just really think that you should talk to kids at a younger age like 13 yrs. Of age cause I’ll tell you why. Well, I was in the eighth grade---I was 14 yrs. old when I lost my virginity to a guy whom I had a crush on and would almost do anything he wanted and I really think he knew that too. But I thought if I gave it up to him he would like me but it lasted about one month and I never heard from him again. I was really crushed by this I didn’t think your first time should be like that and wish to god till this day I would have waited till I was married.

Well now I have a boyfriend for a year now. I think in that short of time we have been through so much, both good and bad. I’ve already had my first abortion Oct. 23, 1993. I really never forget that day. It was a Saturday and me and my boyfriend had been thinking about it ever since I found out I was (pregnant). There was a lot of thinking---one week we wanted to keep it the next we didn’t---it was such a hard thing to go through I never want to have to be in that situation. Well, that Saturday morning I woke up at 6:00 am went to his house to pick him up---it was very dark out. As he got into the car we just looked at each other---we both didn’t really talk the whole way up there---I think in are minds we both were asking are selves if we were doing the right thing and I was also getting really nervous asking myself was it going to hurt, would I chicken out, was I going to regret it. As we got there and turned off the car he turned to me and said, “Are you sure you wanna go ahead with it?” I just sat there. I didn’t want to but I kinda knew it was best for us. He tolled me either way he’d be with me. Well as we walked in there he stopped walking and looked down at my stomach and kissed it and rubbed it very slowly. Then we began walking. I was the first appointment so no one was there except the staff. He gave them the money---it was two hundred fifty dollars. Then the nurse walked in and tolled us to come back. We sat down. She asked how long I thought I was, well Plan Parenthood tolled me I was 10 weeks. She tolled us that I could be over 10. So we went back to this room and took off my pants and panties. My boyfriend came in with me which the nurse was surprised cause a lot of them would chicken out! She gave me a shot in my thigh then she began---it hurt so bad the worst pain ever---I was ripping off my boyfriend’s face---it took about 5 minutes.

After it was done she said I was 13 ½ weeks along so it would be another 200 dollars. lying in bed for 15 minutes we left the room slowly but both very quiet. She had tolled (me) I’d done very well that there had been 13 yrs. olds in there. I couldn’t believe it. As we walked out to leave there was a girl that was giving the sectary money for her’s---she just looked at me and put her head down. I looked like crap---my hair was messed up. Everyone in the waiting room just put their heads down. As me and my boyfriend walked out he gave me a big hug and I looked back the people were all looking. I felt secure with my boyfriend there. A lot of them didn’t have any with them. We drove home once again quiet. I was in shock I guess you could say. That night after I woke up and we decided I needed to eat so we went to a restaurant. As we sat there and ate a little 2-year old boy came up to are table and stared at us. I started to cry a little and could tell my boyfriend did to. It is so hard to see little kids and babies knowing I killed mine. Me and my boyfriend try not to think about it but its so hard. We both got to get on with our lives but we will always remember what we went through. It has also brought us so much closer but I know I never wanna go through it again. My parents don’t know. I’m sure I’ll tell them when I’m older.

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Brad,

Your two hour speech helped me so much and made me think about sex in a totally different perspective. I’m a virgin and I have always planned to stay that way, until I’m married that is. But now I know that it was always for the wrong reasons. Like because I knew that my parents would kill me if I got pregnant or they found out. Also because it’s against my religion. Now It is because I don’t want someone who’s been used so why would they want me used. I’m also totally petrified of getting a disease or losing the guy.

One of the girls in my class has a baby. And when we had sex-ed she talked to me and totally confided in me. She told me that she regrets almost every sexual experience in her past. She said that she loves her baby, but every time she sees him she thinks of how it happened and feels so ashamed. And after your speech she came to me balling about it and I couldn’t help but cry. It touched me so much. Thank you for helping me realize that sex isn’t all fun and games. It’s serious and scary.

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Brad,

The speech was great. Thanks for coming to our school. Almost every thing you said hit home. When you were talking up on the stage today I was sitting with my teen parenting class. Your speech touched all of us so much that two teen mothers, one teacher and a teen father had to walk out because of getting very emotional over the subject. I have never seen my boyfriend cry before over us and Britton (our kid).

When I was 15 I got kicked out of the house when I tolled my mom I was pregnant. I’m now an 11th grader. I messed up my freshman year and will never forget it. If I want to graduate with the class of “98” I have to take not just 6 periods, but 9!!! I wish you could have talked to me before I messed up. I had so many dreams. I wanted to play soccer in the Olympics when I got older. I was softball team captain and swim team captain. I wanted to become a doctor, marry a cute guy, and live in a house with a white picket fence. But right now I play no sports. (Except carry the baby around) I work at Albertsons, and I have no time to my self or with my boyfriend. I thought others could learn from my mistakes. Well I thought wrong. My best friend Nancy is one week over due with her daughter! I just don’t get it.

Well, I’ll get to the point. I just thought it was good for every one to hear what you had to say before any of them do anything stupid to their lives.

Love,
Anonymous

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Poem

The girl who began this poem was raped, became pregnant and later had an abortion. She wrote the first two lines but became so depressed that she shot herself in the head. Her cousin finished the poem.

It’s early yet, the month is one
You can’t see me I’ve just begun.
I’m so small I don’t have to hide,
I’m just a little seed inside.

Four weeks later the month is two
I’m so small but still a part of you.
Mommy you’ll love me, wait and see.
You will be so proud of me.

Time is passing the month is three.
Now anybody is able to see me.
I’ve got black hair my eyes are brown
Mom, your gonna love having me around

It’s getting late the month is five,
Mom didn’t want me so I’m no longer alive
Abortion is the name they give it

It takes your life before you live it
I want to be born the month is six
It’s already been done it can’t be fixed
I guess mommy didn’t want me because she threw me away
She’ll never forget me. I’m in her mind to stay

I’ve got a new home the month is seven
God has welcomed me back to heaven
You would have loved me but now I’m gone
Now only my memory carries on

If I was around the month would be eight
I know mommy would have loved me but now it’s too late.

Goodbye mommy the month is nine
If I would have been born things would have been fine
Even though I’m in heaven I still cry
O mommy, why did you make me die?

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BOYS

A heart is not a plaything
A heart is not a toy
But if you want it broken
Just give it to a boy

Boys like to play with things
To see what makes them run
But when it comes to loving
They do it all for fun

Boys never give their hearts away
They play us girls for fools
And then they play it cool

You’ll wonder where he is at night
You’ll wonder if he’s true
One moment you’ll be happy
One moment you’ll be blue

If you get a chance to see him
Your heart begins to dance
Your life revolves around him
There’s nothing like romance

And then it starts to happen
You worry day and night
You see my friend, you're losing him
It never turns out right

Boys are great but immature
The price you pay is high
He may seem sweet and gorgeous
But remember he’s a guy

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Poem

There’s a typical guy that I know all too well
His nose, like Pinocchio continues to swell,
He likes to take nice girls out for long rides,
Up big hills to watch starry skies
And when he’s wooed them to the top
He moves in close and tries to shlock!
Then if his attempts he finds in vain,
He takes those girls home and thinks, “What a pain!”
Now he says to the next female human he sees,
“Hey beautiful, for you I’ll get down on my knees!”
Young or old, fat or slim,
It really doesn’t matter to him,
Born to charm then strike without warning
After a night or two it gets pretty boring!
So this poem I dedicate to my innocent female friends
Please watch out because he’ll strike again
And even though you’ve got a good head on your shoulders
This guy can fool you just by telling you he’s yours
Take this from a girl who knows
And watch out for the man with the growing nose
Don’t let your name be slandered by him
When you didn’t offer him even one little kiss.
You’re worth more than that, I’ll tell you right now
Keep your respect and use what I’ve found
A good guy can be hard to find
But so are you – you’re one of a kind
So take your time and let God lead you
To the one who’ll truly please you!